I’m a covert narcissist

When I first started this blog a few days ago I had the sole intention of spending each blog post on the next stage of my life.  Then I realized that would probably get boring over time so I’m going to throw some different topics in the mix every few posts.  Plus this will help provide more context around the blogs that do deal mainly with things that have happened in my life.

After years of having my 2nd ex-wife tell me that I am a narcissist and finding books about being in love with a narcissist all over the house I started to do some research on the topic but I never really thought of myself as a narcissist.  I just thought this was my ex-wife’s way of explaining to herself why our marriage was in shambles.  Basically, she was blaming me for our marriage falling apart and she was putting a label on it called narcissism.  It wasn’t until May of this year (2016) that I started connecting some dots while scouring the internet because a girl I had recently dated had some strange behavior patterns and when I told a friend about it he said she sounded like a narcissist.  I began to read a lot of articles on the topic and there are plenty of websites out there that list common traits of a narcissist.  On most lists I found myself checking off every single item.  Here is a list of 21 signs you are narcissist (21 signs you are a narcissist).  I checked off 18 out of 21 or the items.  Here are the 3 I didn’t check off:  I’m not an entertainer, I’m not young anymore (I’m 40) and girls don’t dump me after 4 months.  I usually do the dumping.

I took the standard narcissism quiz that can be found here and scored a 30, which is pretty high.  Any score above a 17 indicates a certain level of narcissism with 40 being the highest score you can get.  What I don’t think this quiz takes into account is that there are different types of narcissists.  When most people think of narcissism  they think of people like Donald Trump.  Loud-mouthed, always in the center of attention wherever they go, very outgoing.  Well, that is not me at all.  I’m a shy, reserved kind of guy.  So how can I be a narcissist?  It turns out there are two types of narcissists: overt and covert narcissists.  The overt narcissist is what I described above: aggressive, arrogant, loud, obnoxious.  The covert narcissist is the opposite: shy, reserved and modest.  Here is a good article on the two types of narcissists (Overt and covert narcissists).

With all of this evidence of me being a narcissist I have finally come to the realization that what my ex-wife had been telling me all along is true.  I am a textbook covert narcissist.  Remember when I said I could only check off 18 of the 21 items on the list above?  Well, the reason I am not an entertainer is because I am a covert narcissist.  You’d have to be overt to want to put yourself out there like that.  “So what do I do now?” I asked myself.  Well, I’ve decided that I am going to own this like a boss.  Since I’ve seen how my behavior has hurt so many people I am going to be consciously aware of my actions and words from now on.  And I am going to write this blog at minimum 5 days a week so that I can truly get my story out there and hopefully help people learn about what kinds of events a child experiences to lead to narcissism and give my readers an in-depth look at what a narcissist is really thinking and feeling when they do the things they do.  My guess is that some of the things I am thinking  when I do something is going to shock you.  You are probably not going to like me very much and that is ok.  I have intentionally left the comments section wide open so that people can say whatever they want.  I am going to have to be very thick skinned but I am ready for that.

Narc

 

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Narc

I’m a 40 year old male narcissist, and I’m going to share my experiences with you so that you can learn how our mind ticks

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  231. Hi there would you mind stating which blog platform you’re working with? I’m planning to start my own blog soon but I’m having a difficult time deciding between BlogEngine/Wordpress/B2evolution and Drupal. The reason I ask is because your design and style seems different then most blogs and I’m looking for something completely unique. P.S My apologies for getting off-topic but I had to ask!

  232. This design is spectacular! You obviously know how to keep a reader entertained. Between your wit and your videos, I was almost moved to start my own blog (well, almost…HaHa!) Excellent job. I really enjoyed what you had to say, and more than that, how you presented it. Too cool!

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  236. Hey! I know this is kind of off topic but I was wondering which blog platform are you using for this site? I’m getting fed up of WordPress because I’ve had problems with hackers and I’m looking at options for another platform. I would be great if you could point me in the direction of a good platform.

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  238. Heya this is kinda of off topic but I was wanting to know if blogs use WYSIWYG editors or if you have to manually code with HTML. I’m starting a blog soon but have no coding skills so I wanted to get guidance from someone with experience. Any help would be greatly appreciated!

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  294. Have you ever considered creating an e-book or guest authoring on other sites? I have a blog based upon on the same information you discuss and would really like to have you share some stories/information. I know my subscribers would value your work. If you’re even remotely interested, feel free to send me an e mail.

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  299. Hey would you mind stating which blog platform you’re working with? I’m looking to start my own blog soon but I’m having a tough time choosing between BlogEngine/Wordpress/B2evolution and Drupal. The reason I ask is because your layout seems different then most blogs and I’m looking for something completely unique. P.S Apologies for getting off-topic but I had to ask!

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  304. I’m really enjoying the theme/design of your website. Do you ever run into any browser compatibility issues? A few of my blog readers have complained about my blog not operating correctly in Explorer but looks great in Chrome. Do you have any tips to help fix this issue?

  305. Hey I know this is off topic but I was wondering if you knew of any widgets I could add to my blog that automatically tweet my newest twitter updates. I’ve been looking for a plug-in like this for quite some time and was hoping maybe you would have some experience with something like this. Please let me know if you run into anything. I truly enjoy reading your blog and I look forward to your new updates.

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  307. Please let me know if you’re looking for a writer for your blog. You have some really great articles and I feel I would be a good asset. If you ever want to take some of the load off, I’d absolutely love to write some articles for your blog in exchange for a link back to mine. Please blast me an e-mail if interested. Thanks!

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  309. Hi would you mind sharing which blog platform you’re using? I’m looking to start my own blog in the near future but I’m having a tough time deciding between BlogEngine/Wordpress/B2evolution and Drupal. The reason I ask is because your layout seems different then most blogs and I’m looking for something completely unique. P.S Sorry for getting off-topic but I had to ask!

  310. Hmm it appears like your blog ate my first comment (it was super long) so I guess I’ll just sum it up what I had written and say, I’m thoroughly enjoying your blog. I too am an aspiring blog blogger but I’m still new to everything. Do you have any recommendations for novice blog writers? I’d definitely appreciate it.

  311. Hi there! I know this is somewhat off-topic however I needed to ask. Does building a well-established website like yours take a massive amount work? I am completely new to operating a blog however I do write in my diary every day. I’d like to start a blog so I can share my own experience and feelings online. Please let me know if you have any kind of recommendations or tips for new aspiring bloggers. Thankyou!

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  313. Today, while I was at work, my cousin stole my iphone and tested to see if it can survive a forty foot drop, just so she can be a youtube sensation. My iPad is now destroyed and she has 83 views. I know this is totally off topic but I had to share it with someone!

  314. Hi, i read your blog from time to time and i own a similar one and i was just wondering if you get a lot of spam responses? If so how do you stop it, any plugin or anything you can recommend? I get so much lately it’s driving me insane so any assistance is very much appreciated.

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  321. Hmm is anyone else experiencing problems with the pictures on this blog loading? I’m trying to determine if its a problem on my end or if it’s the blog. Any responses would be greatly appreciated.

  322. Hi there are using WordPress for your blog platform? I’m new to the blog world but I’m trying to get started and create my own. Do you need any coding knowledge to make your own blog? Any help would be really appreciated!

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  324. I was wondering if you ever considered changing the structure of your website? Its very well written; I love what youve got to say. But maybe you could a little more in the way of content so people could connect with it better. Youve got an awful lot of text for only having 1 or 2 pictures. Maybe you could space it out better?

  325. Today, I went to the beachfront with my children. I found a sea shell and gave it to my 4 year old daughter and said “You can hear the ocean if you put this to your ear.” She put the shell to her ear and screamed. There was a hermit crab inside and it pinched her ear. She never wants to go back! LoL I know this is totally off topic but I had to tell someone!

  326. Hello, i read your blog occasionally and i own a similar one and i was just curious if you get a lot of spam responses? If so how do you stop it, any plugin or anything you can advise? I get so much lately it’s driving me crazy so any support is very much appreciated.

  327. Howdy! I know this is kinda off topic however , I’d figured I’d ask. Would you be interested in trading links or maybe guest authoring a blog article or vice-versa? My blog covers a lot of the same subjects as yours and I feel we could greatly benefit from each other. If you’re interested feel free to send me an email. I look forward to hearing from you! Fantastic blog by the way!

  328. Hmm it appears like your site ate my first comment (it was extremely long) so I guess I’ll just sum it up what I had written and say, I’m thoroughly enjoying your blog. I too am an aspiring blog blogger but I’m still new to everything. Do you have any tips for rookie blog writers? I’d definitely appreciate it.

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  330. Hello! Quick question that’s totally off topic. Do you know how to make your site mobile friendly? My blog looks weird when viewing from my iphone4. I’m trying to find a theme or plugin that might be able to resolve this issue. If you have any recommendations, please share. Thanks!

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  334. Hi would you mind sharing which blog platform you’re working with? I’m looking to start my own blog soon but I’m having a hard time making a decision between BlogEngine/Wordpress/B2evolution and Drupal. The reason I ask is because your design and style seems different then most blogs and I’m looking for something unique. P.S Sorry for getting off-topic but I had to ask!

  335. Hello! This is kind of off topic but I need some help from an established blog. Is it difficult to set up your own blog? I’m not very techincal but I can figure things out pretty quick. I’m thinking about setting up my own but I’m not sure where to start. Do you have any tips or suggestions? Thank you

  336. First of all I would like to say fantastic blog! I had a quick question in which I’d like to ask if you don’t mind. I was curious to find out how you center yourself and clear your head prior to writing. I have had a hard time clearing my mind in getting my ideas out. I do enjoy writing however it just seems like the first 10 to 15 minutes are generally wasted simply just trying to figure out how to begin. Any ideas or tips? Thank you!

  337. My programmer is trying to persuade me to move to .net from PHP. I have always disliked the idea because of the expenses. But he’s tryiong none the less. I’ve been using WordPress on a variety of websites for about a year and am nervous about switching to another platform. I have heard fantastic things about blogengine.net. Is there a way I can import all my wordpress posts into it? Any kind of help would be really appreciated!

  338. Hey there this is kinda of off topic but I was wondering if blogs use WYSIWYG editors or if you have to manually code with HTML. I’m starting a blog soon but have no coding experience so I wanted to get advice from someone with experience. Any help would be enormously appreciated!

  339. Awesome blog! Is your theme custom made or did you download it from somewhere? A design like yours with a few simple tweeks would really make my blog shine. Please let me know where you got your theme. With thanks

  340. Hmm is anyone else having problems with the images on this blog loading? I’m trying to figure out if its a problem on my end or if it’s the blog. Any feed-back would be greatly appreciated.

  341. Have you ever considered about adding a little bit more than just your articles? I mean, what you say is valuable and all. However just imagine if you added some great photos or video clips to give your posts more, “pop”! Your content is excellent but with images and videos, this blog could undeniably be one of the best in its niche. Amazing blog!

  342. Please let me know if you’re looking for a writer for your weblog. You have some really good posts and I feel I would be a good asset. If you ever want to take some of the load off, I’d love to write some material for your blog in exchange for a link back to mine. Please shoot me an e-mail if interested. Many thanks!

  343. Hi, i read your blog occasionally and i own a similar one and i was just wondering if you get a lot of spam comments? If so how do you reduce it, any plugin or anything you can recommend? I get so much lately it’s driving me insane so any assistance is very much appreciated.

  344. I really like your blog.. very nice colors & theme. Did you make this website yourself or did you hire someone to do it for you? Plz answer back as I’m looking to design my own blog and would like to find out where u got this from. appreciate it

  345. Does your website have a contact page? I’m having a tough time locating it but, I’d like to send you an email. I’ve got some ideas for your blog you might be interested in hearing. Either way, great blog and I look forward to seeing it improve over time.

  346. With havin so much written content do you ever run into any problems of plagorism or copyright violation? My site has a lot of completely unique content I’ve either written myself or outsourced but it looks like a lot of it is popping it up all over the web without my agreement. Do you know any methods to help protect against content from being stolen? I’d truly appreciate it.

  347. I’m really loving the theme/design of your blog. Do you ever run into any web browser compatibility problems? A few of my blog visitors have complained about my site not working correctly in Explorer but looks great in Safari. Do you have any tips to help fix this problem?

  348. Do you have a spam issue on this website; I also am a blogger, and I was curious about your situation; many of us have created some nice practices and we are looking to swap methods with others, please shoot me an email if interested.

  349. Hey just wanted to give you a quick heads up. The words in your content seem to be running off the screen in Opera. I’m not sure if this is a format issue or something to do with web browser compatibility but I figured I’d post to let you know. The style and design look great though! Hope you get the problem resolved soon. Cheers

  350. Whats up are using WordPress for your site platform? I’m new to the blog world but I’m trying to get started and set up my own. Do you need any coding expertise to make your own blog? Any help would be greatly appreciated!

  351. Hmm is anyone else encountering problems with the images on this blog loading? I’m trying to figure out if its a problem on my end or if it’s the blog. Any feedback would be greatly appreciated.

  352. With havin so much written content do you ever run into any issues of plagorism or copyright violation? My site has a lot of unique content I’ve either authored myself or outsourced but it appears a lot of it is popping it up all over the web without my authorization. Do you know any ways to help stop content from being ripped off? I’d definitely appreciate it.

  353. Appreciating the persistence you put into your site and in depth information you provide. It’s great to come across a blog every once in a while that isn’t the same outdated rehashed material. Fantastic read! I’ve saved your site and I’m including your RSS feeds to my Google account.

  354. Hello there! I know this is kinda off topic however , I’d figured I’d ask. Would you be interested in trading links or maybe guest writing a blog article or vice-versa? My website discusses a lot of the same subjects as yours and I believe we could greatly benefit from each other. If you are interested feel free to send me an email. I look forward to hearing from you! Wonderful blog by the way!

  355. Does your blog have a contact page? I’m having problems locating it but, I’d like to send you an email. I’ve got some suggestions for your blog you might be interested in hearing. Either way, great site and I look forward to seeing it expand over time.

  356. Hey! I could have sworn I’ve been to this site before but after reading through some of the post I realized it’s new to me. Anyhow, I’m definitely delighted I found it and I’ll be bookmarking and checking back often!

  357. Do you have a spam issue on this website; I also am a blogger, and I was curious about your situation; many of us have created some nice methods and we are looking to exchange strategies with others, be sure to shoot me an e-mail if interested.

  358. It’s a pity you don’t have a donate button! I’d without a doubt donate to this excellent blog! I suppose for now i’ll settle for book-marking and adding your RSS feed to my Google account. I look forward to brand new updates and will talk about this site with my Facebook group. Talk soon!

  359. I as well as my buddies ended up viewing the best tips and tricks on the website then instantly came up with an awful suspicion I had not thanked you for those techniques. Those men became for that reason very interested to learn all of them and have now certainly been loving them. Thanks for really being really helpful and then for picking out this sort of impressive information most people are really needing to be informed on. My personal honest regret for not expressing appreciation to you earlier.

  360. Hi! I know this is kinda off topic however , I’d figured I’d ask. Would you be interested in trading links or maybe guest authoring a blog post or vice-versa? My blog discusses a lot of the same topics as yours and I believe we could greatly benefit from each other. If you’re interested feel free to shoot me an e-mail. I look forward to hearing from you! Fantastic blog by the way!

  361. I know this if off topic but I’m looking into starting my own blog and was curious what all is needed to get set up? I’m assuming having a blog like yours would cost a pretty penny? I’m not very web smart so I’m not 100% sure. Any tips or advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks